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RPGenius: Everyday is an Epic Quest

Firelands is not for fishing

Ever since I can remember, I have felt like I’ve been incomplete.  Not in a bad, depressing way, but in a way that makes me feel like I should be doing something additional to fill gaps.  Then, when I would find something new, be it a new skill, school project, or video game, I would dive into it with fanatic veal, devoting my very being to its completion.  Yes, the completion: that ever-approaching goal on the horizon, simultaneously beckoning me toward its glorious light and taunting me that I hadn’t already completed the journey.  There I am again, feeling incomplete, needing more; this time, more progress toward the goal.  Every time I finish a project, I want to fill that gap with more ventures, but once I have filled that void, it is replaced by a burning desire to reach the conclusion of the tasks and reap the rewards.  Over time, I strive for more complex entities to feed my needs.  It is a bittersweet addiction that has made me exceedingly productive at the cost of my sanity at certain times.

This is the paradox of my life as a geek and a nerd (Side note: No, geek and nerd are not the same, and yes, I know the difference).  I have come to terms with this, despite the increasing amount of grey hair and that weird tic above my right eye sometimes.

Only in the past few years, however, have I made the connection between this mentality and the activity that has filled my gaming needs for the past four years, World of Warcraft.  My need for new quests, the balancing of the internal stats that help me maintain homeostasis (stress versus job success versus relationships versus physical fitness), and the “re-rolling” of my entire being on occasion.  My world, as I’m assuming is similar to many nerd/geeks out there on the interwebs, has so many similarities to the worlds of Orcs and Humans, except with less Deeprun Tram gnome orgies (I hope).  This is my world as a real life RPG.

This realization does a great deal to explain my love of RPG’s of all types above all other types of games.   I take so much enjoyment from all aspects of an RPG, and doing all that I can in these virtual worlds.  Now, with games dipping into RPG elements, I can’t wait for what the future holds for my real world and my virtual life.  For instance, even though shooters were never my thing, you add RPG elements such as in a game like Borderlands, and I will dump 30 hours into it.  This also makes me question how my motivation for playing compares to that of “normal” people.  Am I really using it as an escape, as many people claim, or is it more of an augmented reality experience for me?  Instead of wit and email to finish my quests, I’m using (green) fire with my warlock to take down enemies.

So, please, let me know, what do you think?  Do you feel like you are constantly leveling in your real life, or am I actually insane?

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